As I began my career at De Soto High School my freshman year, there was something that I was looking forward to more than anything else: school dances. The idea of dressing up, going to a nice dinner and then getting to dance with my friends and my date sounded so exciting. Little did I know though that almost nobody actually danced at these school events.

Upon arriving to my first homecoming, I was astounded to see everyone gathered in a circle, barely swaying back and forth. At first glance, I thought that they were all gathered around watching someone in the middle of the circle or something, but really, they were doing what they considered dancing. The dance was nothing like all those high school dramas had made it seem, with exciting music and energetic dancing.

Don’t get me wrong, it’s not that I think that the act of grinding itself is something bad, but it’s the lack of dancing and the awkwardness of it all that makes me uncomfortable.

 Think about it: all that the “grind circle” consists of is one student rubbing their back-end against their partner’s crotch area while standing around and making eye contact with others who are doing the same thing. This goes on for the entirety of the dance. Not to mention the fact that teachers and parent chaperones are standing only a few feet away.

What happened to the actual dancing? I don’t like the fact that people feel the need to grind just because that’s what everyone else is doing. I wish that we could just abandon these social norms for just one night and actually dance freely. Instead it seems we’re too preoccupied with other’s opinions to let loose enough to feel comfortable really dancing.

In the past, I’ve brought a few outside dates to De Soto dances, and they seem just as confused as I am about the “grind circle” situation. In addition, I’ve been to different schools’ dances and grinding doesn’t seem to exist there. People just dance in whatever way they want.

At the rate we’re going, it seems that each year more and more people are integrated into the circle. I say that we stop it now and that we actually dance instead. While trying to fit in is an attempt that every high schooler makes and that effort will certainly not be completely eliminated, we could start by not making others feel like they need to do a somewhat sexual “dance” movement.

At the last few dances, I’ve been able to let go and dance however I wanted to, and I honestly had a lot more fun than I had at any of the previous dances. I encourage everyone to not feel pressured to dance a certain way but just to go crazy and have fun because that’s what school dances are for.